Keyboard Warriors Anonymous
Welcome to the arena where caps lock is a lifestyle and sources are “trust me, bro.” This is our support group for people who confuse comment sections with congressional hearings—and for the rest of us who watch, popcorn in hand.
What qualifies for admission
- Epic reply chains where nobody read past the headline
- Paragraphs so long they require a sherpa
- “Actually…” with zero facts and ten footnotes to vibes
- Drive-by links to mysterious blogs that no one can verify
- Victory laps after losing the plot
How we rank the warriors
- Warrior Rank: Caps Lock Cadet · Reply-Guy Recruit · Paragraph General · Keyboard Commander
- Body Count: Estimated number of strangers dragged into the skirmish
- Battle Arena: The scene of the crime (YouTube comments, Grandma’s Facebook, etc.)
- Sustainability Index: Hours spent arguing after the thread died
- Collateral Schadenfreude: How loudly the crowd cackled
Today’s Nuggets
Submit a nugget
Got a screenshot of a hero who typed for three hours and proved nothing? Enlist them.
How it works (rules of engagement)
Send the link/screenshot/video with a short caption.
We verify it’s public, add context, and assign a rank.
If approved, it joins the wall with badges and full battle stats.
Community guidelines (funny, not feral)
- Public content only—no private DMs, leaks, or hacked stuff
- No doxxing; redact personal info that isn’t essential
- Attack the argument and behavior, not protected characteristics
- Clearly label parody/satire when applicable
- Minors are blurred or skipped—snark has standards
FAQ
What earns “Keyboard Commander”?
Sustained multi-platform combat, high body count, and the unshakable confidence of a cat on a countertop.
Do I need a full thread screenshot?
Helpful, yes. We also accept links with timestamps and a captioned summary.
Will you publish private groups or DMs?
No. If it’s not public, it’s not in.
Can I stay anonymous as a submitter?
Absolutely. We’ll credit you if you want—or keep you shadowy and powerful.
The warrior deleted their account—now what?
If verification holds, we keep an archived, redacted version; otherwise it’s removed.
Can I nominate myself?
If you learned something and want to share the cautionary tale, we’re all ears.